


I’m A Monster

by CoffeeCorner



Category: Friends (TV)
Genre: Abuse, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Angst, Bisexual Male Character, Canon LGBTQ Character, Drug Use, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/F, F/M, Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Multi, References to Depression, Rock Stars, bi!chandler
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-04
Updated: 2021-02-04
Packaged: 2021-03-16 11:47:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29206830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CoffeeCorner/pseuds/CoffeeCorner
Summary: Au: Chandler and Ross never become friends in college, but knew of each other due to Ross briefly dating Carol.Chandler starts a band with Carol and Susan in college and eventually Kip. Him and Kip are in a abuse relationship that Chandler just can’t seem to leave. The drugs and alcohol don’t help, but hey he’s a rockstar.————————Chandler bumps into Ross in a coffee shop and it set in motion the start to his new life.
Relationships: Chandler Bing/Joey Tribbiani
Comments: 7
Kudos: 25





	I’m A Monster

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so this is the darkest fic I am working on, please read all the trigger warnings!

It's so hot here. The air is thick. Chandler could practically taste the salt in the atmosphere from all the sweaty bodies on his lips. He was set to perform in half an hour and he was so high he didn’t even know if he could stand. He didn’t even know if he had feet at this point. The cough medicine he had drank around an hour ago wasn’t mixing well with his diet of alcohol and weed, now that he thinks about it, has he even eaten anything today? The question quickly leaves his mind as if it’s hard for his brain to hold onto a single thought.  _ That’s not good.  _ How was he supposed to perform when thinking is a challenge.

“Chandler where are you, You useless piece of shit!” Suddenly he is being pulled to his feet, _ oh there they are,  _ he thought before being slammed against the nearest hard surface. Chandler is met with the face of a very angry looking Kip. “You’re fucked aren’t you?” Chandler’s response is to laugh. _ Not the best move on his part  _ he thinks as Kip slams him harder against the wall. 

“Can you perform?” Kip sounds desperate now. Guilt fills Chandler's chest. 

“..Yes.” He manages to get out. Kip raises and eyebrow at him as if to say  _ ’you’re fucking kidding me right?’.  _

Chandler signs pushing Kip away from him. He takes a deep breath. “Yes. I can perform. Just give me a minute and a drink of water.” 

Kip backs off before tutting. “Yeah I’m sure that glass of water is going to flush out all the coke you have done today!” He storms off towards the stage.

“Jokes on you,” Chandler slurs “I haven’t done any coke today!”  _ I think.  _

_ »»—————————⍟—————————-«« _

Three days after one of the worst performances of his life he finds himself wandering into a coffee shop where the sign reads:  **Central perk** . It was nice on the inside, very chic, but homely and the smell of coffee hitting his nose set his feet on a course over to the counter. 

“Hey.” He said to the very pretty girl behind the counter. She seemed to be in her own world stirring a spoon around and around in a large green mug. Chandler cleared his throat. “Excuse me?” 

“Yeah,” she sighed before jumping as if she didn’t realise she was at work. She looks up at Chandler. “Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry, I was in my own little world there.”  _ I guessed that,  _ he thought to himself before smiling, not being able to get mad at pretty girls. “What can I get you, sir?” 

“Just a latte would be great-“ 

“Chandler? Chandler Bing?” Chandler cringed at his full name being used before turning towards the voice.

A tall man with dark hair slicked back and a tan suit on was who he was met with. Chandler squinted at him before realisation hit him. “Ross?” He said with caution in case this wasn’t in fact Ross.  _ That would be embarrassing. _

“Yeah!” Ross seemed over the moon that Chandler had remembered his name. He began pulling Chandler into a hug which caused him to flinch, he tried to cover it up by laughing and slapping Ross on the back before they parted. “It’s been so long, how are you?” 

_ Well I wish I was dead.  _ “I’m great thanks, how are you?” 

The girl at the counter cleared her throat causing both him and Ross to look back at her. “Aren’t you going to introduce me?” Chandler raised an eyebrow at her as if to say ‘but we just met.’ He was relieved that he didn’t let it slip out his mouth when Ross started talking. 

“Oh sorry Rach, this is Chandler Bing,” Ross moved in between him and Rachel. “Chandler this is Rachel Green.”

“Nice to meet you.” He says reaching out his hand to shake hers, she accepts his hand with a flirtatious laugh and a bat of her eyelashes. Ross clears his throat. 

“So how come I haven’t seen you around here before, Chandler?” Ross seems genuine with his question, but Chandler can’t help but feel he is digging for something.

“Oh, I’m just in town while my band performs here.” 

“You’re in a band?” Rachel says in awe.

“Yeah,” Chandler smiles cockily. “I’m the lead singer.” He cringes inwardly when he thinks back to his last performance and how he has nothing to be cocky about. 

“Wait,” Ross sniggers beside him. “You’re seriously in a band?” 

Annoyance fills Chandler's mind. “Yes I am.” He shuffles on his feet for a beat before adding. “You should come and see us perform.” 

“Oh my god,” Rachel clutches her hands to her chest. “I would love to!” 

Ross seems unsure before agreeing and asking when and where Chandler and his band will be performing. Chandler gave Ross all the details on a napkin before leaving with his latte he eventually received off Rachel, taking a sip he thought,  _ Well this isn’t my order, but I am definitely not going back in there.  _

_ »»—————————⍟—————————-«« _

He was smoking a cigarette outside the building when he saw Ross and a small group of people wandering up to him. He recognised Rachel and gave a small wave before putting out his cig. 

“Hey!” Ross greeted before introducing his friends. “This is my sister Monica, Joey, Phoebe and you have met Rachel.” Rachel giggles before leaning forward and squeezing his arm.

“I am so excited to see your band perform!” She seemed to be bursting with excitement. The other girls in the group also seem on the same energy level as they all gushed in agreement. Chandler gulped down his nervousness,  _ I really wish I was high right now.  _

He scratched the back of his neck “Well I hope I don’t disappoint.”  _ I’m good at that.  _

Before anything else could be said the door beside him swings open and bangs loudly against the stone wall. Chandler jumps as he turns to see, once again, an angry looking Kip. “Where the fuck-“ Kip stops talking when he isn’t met with just Chandler’s pathetic face. 

“I’ll be in a minute Kip.” Chandler says, trying to make his voice sound fine and his tone even. Kip just looks him up and down and briefly toward Ross and his group before heading back in.

“Wow, what an asshole.” The blonde one says, Chandler recalls her name is Phoebe. 

Chandler laughs before saying. “Try being in a band with him  _ and _ living with him.” No one laughs. “...well, we should be starting soon you guys should head in.” They all seem to give him a sympathetic look as they shuffle towards the door. It made Chandler want to throw up.

_ »»—————————⍟—————————-«« _

When Chandler goes inside Carol is waiting for him with a shot and his accessories. He takes the shot from her and inhales it. She reaches over him to put on his necklace as he leans in and whispers “Marry me?” 

She laughs placing her hands on his chest. “Unfortunately you have something I’m not quite a fan of.”

He acts bothered before saying, “If it were plastic you’d like it.”

He hears Susan snicker from the corner. “Do you think she’s talking about that part? Or the rest of you attached to it?” Chandler sticks his tongue out at her before Carol walks over giving Susan a peck on the cheek. 

“Okay,” Chandler claps his hands together and turns to look at his band. “What do you call two lesbians, a mean gay and a confused bisexual?”

Susan huffs out a laugh and Kip glares from where he stands at the back of the room. Chandler knew he’d be paying for saying that later, but right now he couldn’t care less. “Way, No Way?” Susan replies. Saying their band name out loud always made him cringe.

“I was gonna say a whole lot of mental health issues, but yours is cuter.” He replies before heading off towards the stage. 

_ »»—————————⍟—————————-«« _


End file.
